Nature Calls

Western style toilets are becoming common in China. I'm not really sure how common, because I haven't had the chance to visit the homes of any local Chinese. The bathrooms in all of the modern apartments I have seen are equipped with familiar plumbing. In new areas like where we are, the plumbing can handle toilet paper. In older areas, there is always a little trash can by the toilet where you are expected to dispose of your used wipes.

There are, apparently, Chinese jokes about people trying to stand on a sit-down toilet. I doubt there is much reality to that. They are probably just jokes to make fun of country bumpkins. Then again, the great Mao Zedong himself refused to use western style toilets. When he made visits to Moscow, he would demand that a platform be built around the facilities in his hotel room, so he could stand above the toilet. Great visual image, that one.

Public toilets will typically have one stall with a western toilet, and the rest are squat toilets. That might seem like a nice concession to Westerners, but let me tell you it is not. If you think that you are horrified by the thought of using a squat toilet, it is only because you haven't personally been faced with the choice. At that moment of choice, you suddenly realize that they have done you a great service by giving you any option other than sitting on that thing.

So now it is time for your short quiz.

Question:

You are on vacation in China and you gotta to go. Which toilet do you use, Toilet A, or Toilet B?

If you are having any trouble choosing, let me give you a close-up view of Toilet B. This one is definitely worth clicking on the image so you can really see the details.

Yes, those really are maggots. And they are alive.

Answer:

:

None of the above. Avoid Chinese public toilets at all cost. Go before you leave. Go again before you leave. If you do have to go, go with the squatter. If, like our family, you like to go camping, you can just think of it like crapping in the woods. And if you are squeamish, you may want to consider not coming at all. Because in that case, your other options are: Don't drink water, don't eat, never get farther than half and hour away from home base, or bring a supply of adult diapers.